Quieted by Truth

Be still and know that I am God.  (Ps. 46:10)

I lift up my soul to the Lord. I lift my heart, my eyes, my countenance for the Lord is near.

The Lord is near to all who call on His Name.

You have drawn near to me, O Lord, in answer to my cries in the night.

You do not leave the afflicted unnoticed or unattended. 

You are kind and loving and caring ~ moved with compassion for those in need ~ gracious toward all You have made.  

Oh, how these truths comfort me! 

My heart is comforted as I recall Your lovingkindness. 

My soul is quieted within by Truth.

Gladdened once again as peace and serenity settle into my soul,

a smile of sweet assurance comes with them....

For You make me glad, O Lord… (Ps. 92:4)

Julie Engler Miles, all rights reserved.

I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore, my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure because You will not abandon me.... You have made known the path of life; You will fill me with joy in Your presence, with eternal pleasures at Your right hand.  Psalm 16:8-11

* * *
Bless the Lord, O my soul!
My heart is glad at the thought of you, Lord.
You make my heart glad.

Once again the power of the Word accomplishes its purpose.
You are the Living Word ~ and You gladden my heart.

* * *

This is no small thing if you know me well… and I share this today so you will know that God provides a rescue for the oppressed, the afflicted, and the broken-hearted.

Despair and depression and hopelessness have tried to take my life for as far back as I can remember and as recently as yesterday.

I bless the Lord for giving me life and sustaining my life ~ even when I didn’t want Him to ~ even when I would have preferred to give up ~ when the enemy’s torment and lies have come frighteningly close to convincing me to give in to death.

Like yesterday….

Just yesterday, it all felt too hard and I felt too tired to want to keep going.
Just yesterday, I dragged myself through another lifeless day.
Just yesterday, I felt the despair of living the rest of my life in this torment.
Just yesterday, I felt like blowing my brains out.

* * *

But, today….

Today, my heart is glad in Your presence, Lord.
Today, You make my heart glad as I think of You.
Today, word of Your unfailing love sustains me.
Today, I choose Life... because Love makes me want to live.

* * *

I will be glad and rejoice in Your love, for You [see] my affliction and [know] the anguish of my soul.
Psalm 31:7


Julie Engler Miles
journal entry dated Nov. 25, 2009

I will wait....

I will wait for You, Lord.

I want You to be the One
to touch the deep, deep place
in me that longs to be satisfied.

Only You can satisfy this ache.
Anything, or anyone else,
I believed could satisfy it
is an empty counterfeit.

I look to You, Lord.
Satisfy and be the answer
to the deep desires of my very being.

I will wait....


Copyright 2011, Julie Engler Miles.

Desire run amok...

Lord, make my desire for You
first and foremost in my heart,
so there is nothing
I desire more than You.

When I feel the deep ache within me,
I confess that I cannot say,
like the psalmist,
that my longing is for You.*

My desires have run amok;
the very desires You set within me!
You would never give us longings
that pull us away from You.
They are meant to draw us to You.
We are the ones who exchange You
for “lesser gods” we think will satisfy.

Heal my desires, Lord.
Don't take them away,
and I refuse to bury them any longer.
I just need You to redirect them, reorder them,
and heal the parts of me that need healing.

Remove from my affections
anything and everything
that takes the place You
are meant to have in my life.

Increase my desire for You, O Lord,
and let this ache be for You!

Only You satisfy our deepest longings.


 * As the deer pants and longs for streams of water,
   so my soul pants for you, O God. (Psalm 42:1) 

Victims and Vagabonds

Victims become vagabonds
until they choose
to stop running and face
what needs to be faced in their lives.

I've been running my whole life, Lord,
and Your love draws me home
to change that.

Love takes victims and vagabonds
and changes them into
settled down members
of a new household where
they are loved enough...
to feel safe enough...
to stop running from life
and take their place in the world.

Julie Engler Miles, c. 2010
All rights reserved


 

The face of Love...

I need to see Your face, Jesus. 

I can resist temptation  as long as my eyes are fixed on You,

and I see the love and loveliness of Your face.  

I will gaze upon Your face when I feel myself being drawn away from You. 

Apart from You, Lord, I have no good thing. 

Sorrows will increase for those who run after other gods. 

O Lord, keep me from running away from You.

O Love that will not let me go....

A hymn from my childhood comes to mind, Lord,

as I wrestle with a part of me that wants to

throw the towel in and go my own way.

"O Love that wilt not let me go,

I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
that in thine ocean depths
its flow may richer, fuller be."
(George Matheson, 1842-1906)

Thank You for Your love 

that will not let me go,

even when I try to pry my fingers loose.

Double-mindedness and rebellion

war against You, Lord...

and still, Your love will not let go.

I picture a screaming toddler

having a tantrum, 

trying to free herself from her parents’ death grip.

That has been me, Lord.

Wanting to be free of You

to do exactly as I please,

even if it is dangerous and foolish.

But, in Your great love and wisdom,

You hold fast to this wayward child of Yours.

Forgive me, Lord.

Thank You for such amazing love.

I shudder to think what would become of me

if I managed to wrestle myself free of You,

or if You let go of me.

Thank You for the assurance that You

will never leave me nor forsake me,

O Love that will not let me go! 

 

Julie Engler Miles, Copyright 2002

The angry mob

I am easily pulled away from you, Lord. 

I picture the temptations of this world like an angry mob in the streets,
pulling me away from You by one arm,
while I reach for You with the other. 

I look toward You, desperate to stay with You; 
my eyes fixed on You,
my hand reaching for You,
knowing that as long as I can see Your face,
I will want You above all else. 

Capture my gaze, O Lord. 
Rescue me from the angry mob! 
Take hold of my hand so I don’t lose my way!

I sit with You each morning and see things so clearly.
Then by evening, I’ve lost the truth and exchanged it for lies….



Copyright 2011, Julie Engler Miles

The way is long, the journey hard...

There is no denying that we travel along the way of a long, hard journey.

Many have lost strength.

Many are on the verge of giving up… or turning back.

Others have forgotten … or lost sight of what it’s all for and where they’re headed.

Or maybe you never really knew in the first place… and were just following the crowd. Maybe you’ve lost your way… wandered off the path in the monotony of the weariness.

The way is long and perilous. We are tempted to wander, prone to falter along the way. Wide is the path that leads to destruction.

And who hasn’t lost the joy of the journey at different bends in the road and wondered where the promised abundant life is found? It's easy to lose sight of the Joy set before us on this long, hard road, especially with the voice of discouragement taunting, “Too long. Too hard. You’ll never make it. Why bother? Just give up. Turn back."

Lost, weary, miserable travelers. The world is full of them.

Take heart from the words of a fellow traveler. Hear the cries of a heart set on pilgrimage, and listen for the deepest, truest cries of your own heart. Then allow the voice of the One who hears our cries to sustain you with words of His unfailing love.

Be strong. Be courageous! The journey is epic.

The Lord is near to all who call on Him, and He will bring us safely through to the victory.

The journey begins....

There is one God and Father of all,
who is above all and through all and in all.

In Him we breathe and move and have our being.

(Ephesians 4:6;  Acts 17:28)

Lord, penetrate me with this truth ~

with the pure, simple truth of of these words.

There is such simplicity and pure clarity in Your Word

that is so different from the complexity and confusion of the way I live.

I want to shed the confusion and live in Your clarity.

It is in You that I have my being.

So simple.

Don't let me complicate it anymore, Lord.

Life has convoluted the truth for so long,

but now is the time to shed the lies

and find my being solely in You.

I sit before You now

ready and willing to shed everything 

that defines me other than You.

Strip it all away

so that all that remains of my being

is You and who You created me to be.

I'm ready, Lord.

Remove what can be shaken, that is, created things --

so that what cannot be shaken may remain.

(Hebrews 12:27)